The Woods

The Light became brighter, illuminating the edges of the trees and bringing the woods to life. Breathlessly they observed the true rush of daylight and the land from which their hearts took flight.

 

It had been a freezing morning and the land was white as snow with the paths glistening. The streetlights had illuminated a clean peace but as they faded, and dawn came, the soft light that drew its way around the angles of humanities constructions was an wake-up call entitled ‘Today, is a mountain day’.

Don’t take this literally, no mountains were to be found, but stepping into the unknown hills and woods was a climb of its own, embracing the foliage and knowing every step must be mindful of the ever-changing status of the land. The first few steps were harder than they had expected, being more used to the sound of cars and crowds than nature alone, and not having prepared their feet for the muddy terrain. But they persevered uphill until a view broke out before them and an alleviation washed over their weighty shoulders. The distant valley and far beyond bowed before the gaze of her eyes, no photograph or picture could have shown the treasure that was a view full of houses miniaturised to a backdrop with hills standing proud displaying their woods and castles in a mark of stature.

In the wake of the view the energy was palpable and eager were their hearts to carry on and discover more of what this rural retreat had to offer.

Bright yellow blooms were bursting into life just as the sky sent down a flurry of snowfall that wouldn’t settle and the air became colder. She held her hands up to her ears, the cold wind having swept away the protection from her ever-growing hair and thought of all the warm things she had that would have done a better job. No room for after thought when you are in the midst of it all.

The Weather eased off not long after and the landscape became more condensed with fallen trees and woodlands. At the same time, the path became more narrow and the people that passed, fewer. This is where silence and peace were really to be found. For those they had seen alone this was the ultimate test of being comfortable with your own company.

The views sprawled and their steps quickened and blurred in the growing confidence of their strides and soon they approached a set of caves. Carved deeply into the stonework were ancient symbols and faces, the silence became more abundant. The hollows in he caves echoed with an eerie whistle as a shiver ran through them as they took in the enormity of the space. It was somewhere they’d heard about, a place of potion making and witchcraft from earlier days. They studied the symbols carefully as the cold wind picked up, causing them to brace their selves against it. It was then that they heard a shuffling sound from within and the shadow of a figure began to emerge from the darkness. They were quick to turn and continue on the path, footsteps a little quicker. The presence had startled them and it had felt to silent for there to be anyone in the area.

Stopping at the bottom they turned around and looked back up. There at the top was a woman and her dog. The laughter was simultaneous, their minds had been racing with false possibility as stories of old had ebbed into their sense. The woman looked at them as if they’d gone mad, it was probably true.

After a moment they carried on, with the exhilaration lingering, and soon found that they were once again on the path, lighthearted and full of joy in the most honest of moments, a hill in front of them left to climb.

The Light became brighter, illuminating the edges of the trees and bringing the woods to life. Breathlessly they observed the true rush of daylight and the land from which their hearts took flight.

Just a little story for today,

Daisy x

 

 

 

 

 

 

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We made it through Winter

We made it through winter, or this is what I’ll say, when I tell myself that the bitter cold is just a few more days.

We made it through winter, the snow at our doors, the frost at our feet, and the cold under paws.

We made it through winter, we got out of bed,  we went out into the cold fresh days and then back to rest our heads.

We wrapped up warm and drank hot drinks that melted the frost and helped us think, we scraped our cars and drove real far, because winter really had a place in our hearts.

We stayed up late because it was dark to soon and saw, in the clear fresh air, the stars and the moon.

We made it through winter, or this is what I’ll say, when spring dawns, and I’m ready to thaw, from these cosy nights and days.

 

Celebrating a new found love of the crisp beauty of winter, although I’ll always be loyal to summer.

Happy Friday!

Daisy x

 

 

Nature (Quote for today)

Sometimes I venture into other explorations and creations but it always come back to that one. The thing you can close your eyes and allow to flow from your mind onto a crisp white page. Scribbles and swirls with a deciphered destination.

Let your words change this forsaken generation of media moments and give your voice a chance to calm while you breathe in the words of others. Deal those words like a game of poker. Keep your cards close to your chest until you are ready to reveal the jewel of your collection. Then try again and again until you make a change.

I hope a day never comes when our voices are powerless more so than now. Take the time to write all of them down and breathe them in as they are returned. Value each syllable like a gift.

Daisy x

Work-life Imbalance

Wandering into the office with a smile on their face “isn’t it good to be back?”

Honestly, I’d rather have had another day off to get lost in nature. But here we are.

Tap. Tap. Tap, away on a machine I can’t stare at for too long without changing the colour scheme.

Scribbling away on a notebook, then another and another, ripping out messy useless pages. outdated, after just two weeks.

All set and after a quick depressing lunch of microwave made pasta, still working.

Repeat the process above and it’s 5pm. I look at the space I made on my desk for flowers but don’t make a promise I can’t keep that it will be filled the next day.

The director is right behind me almost the whole way home. Anxiety, and a growling engine from where I nearly stall in eagerness to get home.

Walking through the door and turning on the lights, lighting some candles. No smell of food.

Making pasta (the real kind), pouring in fresh ingredients, turning on some TV for sound that is more than just my own mind ticking away.

Sitting down to reply to a letter, delicately swirling the letters. So engrossed I didn’t see the mistake, the most beautiful crossed out words.

I dissolve into the brand new sofa and that’s me for an hour, rest doesn’t wait for sleep.

Breathing in the candle light, stomach filled with food that I ate thoughtfully pondering the colours of its nutrition. Balance doesn’t have to be perfect.

Just a moment where you resolve those niggles from the day. Pour in some sounds from the earth and take a moment to eat well and be human in the most simple way possible.

When you love your job it becomes your life, but there’s not quite a balance when you find you have a deficit in you personal goals.

My resolution for this year was not to restrict, but to allow myself to do as I felt I needed to when I could and that is to restore a balance of peace.

Congratulations on making today a success, whatever you did to acknowledge what you needed.

Daisy x

 

 

Emergence

Waking up in a cold and desolate place was hard: The light streamed in through a crack in the heavy blackout curtains. I’d pour myself into the water that streamed over my skin and dissolve into my own mind.

Readying myself to say goodbye to the harsh daylight was harder: Stepping outside and knowing that those few moments in a morning were the fresh air that I would breath, the life that I would see and the only real ground I would feel beneath my feet until night had fallen.

Everyday for months I would lose the natural light, say goodbye to the real world and play at politeness with people who were consumed within themselves.

Everyone has a tipping point, a breaking point.The day where my morality was questioned was that day.

And so I relished those moments outdoors and drew energy to change. I was blessed with a single chance.

I shed the weight like a tree shaking off its leaves to embrace winter, and then shedding the cold snow as it thaws.

Here I am, emerging. The light is harsh but the beauty it reveals is worth the strain it brings to my sight.

Hello daytime, I look forward to waking up and all the things that follow.

I look forward to writing them down.

Daisy x

Who I Am, Not Who Am I?

I’ve learnt a few things about myself, even if I can’t say much else for certain and what better way to start a new chapter than by introducing your character as she begins.

So here’s me, a twenty-year old student living in the smallest part of Wales having made some pretty big decisions to get there:

  • I have a severe crush on art, photography and visual beauty. Black and white photography inspires something in my mind I can’t quite explain, maybe it’s the love of contrast and the areas of grey which say so much or maybe it’s just how provocative a lack of colour, something laid bare can be.
  • My love for trains is still as undying as it was when as an 8 year-old child. I don’t care too much to learn about their composition but I was sat in a train station yesterday waiting to head home when I notices some steam trains. queue excitable Facebook status and smile.
  • I have learnt that contrary to my own fear growing up doesn’t mean losing heart for all, it just means learning to put that heart so strongly into things that we are a little more tired, that a smile may not always be visible but it can always be there and that some deep part of ourselves can appreciate more of the complexity and chaos in the forever that lies before us with the hazy days that have been.
  • I study philosophy but I have a long way to go. Everyday I can learn a new theory with such a minute difference to the last one but with such big consequences it literally blows my mind! I don’t think we can every know everything but that’s a beautiful thing because it means if we choose a good selection no-one can ever say we’re not infinitely unique…and despite ideas of determinism that means we chose ourselves for ourselves!
  • Family are so important to me. It doesn’t matter who I don’t get on with that well, who’s cooking I don’t like or who winds me up until I want to explode, the ones who are there for me when I need them are the ones I will always keep in my heart. Friends change so do the places you live, boyfriends, girlfriends and everything in between and it’s true that you do get a say in your family but those who are and always have been there for you will support you and eventually matter more than anything else. I don’t always show it but that’s not what counts most anyway.
  • Sparkling in many senses is something I aim to do always. A sparkle in my eye, glittery lip gloss, even the accentuation of polka dot laces in my red Doc Martens. It’s important to me to always feel like I’m shining. It might so silly or vain but if I can brighten my day a little I might help someone else do the same.
  • I love to read, but in considerations of time I actually just watch a lot of movies and listen to a lot of music. I have over 90 playlists on Spotify, a brand new shiny Netflix account which so far has been used for Reign and the Gilmore Girls and Youtube regularly suggests I listen to Coldplay-The Scientist on repeat when I’m sad. My Browsers know me well, my books are a more neglected topic.
  • And finally, because I’m sure you have enough to go on, all I really want to do in the world is write, since I was old enough to hold a crayon and write on whatever surface was available (including the furniture) I’ve know what I want to do.

So there’s what I know that I wanted to share a little of with you before I begin the story. I’m a 20-something still learning and despite the expectations of me increasing by the day I’m making the most of now. The beautiful moments in which I walk.

Daisy xaddtext_com_MTMyNjQ3MzA4NDM

No Make-up Mondays

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I’m slowly easing into the idea that being older has certain types of responsibilities and that twenty is going to be a year to get used to knowing that after 21 things are going to become really real.

The days of long-nights, endless re-application of lip gloss and being able to eat whatever I wanted whenever I wanted it are fading quickly. The last time I saw 5 am was last time I went travelling, when I make it to a 9:15 lecture with make-up on it’s probably because I was lucky enough to wake-up that way and the thought of a tub of Ben&Jerry’s makes me feel gross.

But all is not lost because in making it this far I have survived a few things:The Teen Pregnancy Years (I’ve been known to kill cacti, I think I need a puppy first), I am almost at 100% in recovering from M.e; It’s going to be with me forever but it will never stop me, The “everybody is getting engaged” stage I’m happily working on me because as cute as it is being proposed to from the fish tank in the Sea life Center (Yes, I know someone who did this!) I’m waiting on a man who knows me when I know myself and finally, I survived all the times I ran across the road without looking, most of the times I could have been caught doing something I shouldn’t and I’ve never woken up in Russia in an ice bath minus an organ. I think I’m doing pretty well.

No make-up Mondays are about making time for me. Not being bare-faced (because frankly I’m going to optimize what I’ve got for as long as I can and putting on make-up can be really cathartic). So today I sat and read, I’m reading a book called “Not that Kind of Girl” by Lena Dunham and it’s pretty inspiring. This is the first biography I have ever read and considering how much I love to delve into the inner depths of peoples’ lives I can’t believe I’ve never even bought one before.

After this I started writing and felt inspired, page after page of words I’ve been looking for, for months! And here I am on my first no make-up Monday starting a brand new chapter for you all to read along with. The good, the bad and the undoubtedly ugly.

Here we go,

Daisy

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